Premier League Preview Week 2

Prepare your defibrillators, cancel your gym subscription.  You’ll have all the cardio you’ll ever need just by watching Arsenal being dethroned as „The Invincibles”  by Manchester United after a game, or two. 

Swansea v Manchester United 2 Pointless to even play other teams isn’t it? 

Bournemouth vs Watford X2 No one cares 

Burnley v West Brom X Clash of the thundercunt titans having a shithousery in defending skills 

Leicester vs Brighton 1 After that Arsenal game? meh 

Liverpool vs Crystal Palace 1 Couthino still „injured”. Bonus Arnold to make every British pundit to wax lyrical about him and Daily Mail already preparing bombastic headlines about his cars. 

Southampton vs West Ham 1X Does anyone really care? 

Stoke vs Arsenal 1X2 Olivier Giroud to score his 100th goal for Arsenal  against The Legions of Middle Earth. Sanchez still „injured”. This week is  from lack of sex 

Huddersfield vs Newcastle 1 Playing to promote Sky Bet Championship 

Tottenham vs Chelsea X2  Spurs play at Wembley (hahaha) and Chelsea play after Burnley (hohoho). The only outcome I’d like would be this :

Manchester City vs Everton X I’ve seen Perugia vs Crotone and it was more exciting  than the soul crushing experience of seeing  City players trying to act like they enjoy playing. 

Anunțuri

Premier League Preview Week 1

Here we fucking go 

Arsenal v Leicester X2
: because it’s Friday and it’s the first game of the season for Arsenal. 

Watford v Liverpool 2 :  Couthino will play the game of his life just to show Barca they need to bid +£1 to transfer him. Also lots of goals each side. 

Everton vs Stoke 1: Everyone hates them fucking ogres 

Crystal Palace vs Huddersfield X No one cares 

Southampton vs Swansea 1 No one cares 

West Brom vs Bournemouth 1 No one cares except that baseball cap twat 

Chelsea vs Burnley 1 Chelsea needs a victory like a young player needs a loan to Vitesse 

Brighton vs Manchester City 2 Banter when a new promoted team is going to score against a billion pound defence 
Newcastle vs Tottenham X2 Spurs are not playing at Wembley so they might have a chance to win it, also they’d like to revenge for being bantered off by Newcastle twice: 1,

Manchester United vs West Ham 1 José will get his dark arts kit and he’ll start crying to the red before the game is even played. 
Now put your wife, your sarnie and your virginity on this accumulator to win fuck all.